Annoyed by Inability

I am fed up. Completely annoyed. I find myself wondering why. Why i deal? Why i am unable to be normal? Why am i the way i am? I think that maybe instead of thinking "why are you so incapable of moving on and being my friend," i should be thinking of ways to fix myself.

Many may call my current thoughts to be insecurities within myself, a useless excuse for others to trample on me. But maybe in reality, i am the one truly at fault. For the past couple of years, i have been on a journey of self identity, a time i have invested on thinking about me. Could it be possible that in all of this time for myself, i have failed to realize what others need me to be. Sure, i can gladly say that i am happy with the majority of who i have become today. Sure, i can say that i earnestly have changed from the person i used to be. But have i changed to be a monster? Someone who does nothing but cause annoyances and troubles to others. i do not feel that i can truly say that i have grown to be a person worth dealing with. "You're overreacting" " "I can't deal with you." "People ask me why i'm even you're friend."

Am i really that stupid? To believe all these truths to be lies?

Am i an idiot...to even wonder why i try?

Should i just give up and forget all that we've been through?

Should i forget about everything...forget about you?

Here i am

Fed up by my inability

Unable to do anything

Unable to take any responsibility?

I am fed up. I am tired. I am annoyed by my inability to see the truth.